¿Qué buscáis de vuestros perros?
Muchas veces pregunto a lo largo de los cursos que imparto o durante el trabajo esta cuestión. De su respuesta dependerá el enfoque que le daremos a la vida de nuestros perros. Hay mucha gente que busca la simple y sana compañía, otras prefieren un amigo con el que compartir experiencias, muchas personas buscan la moda, otras lo quieren para darle una utilidad como proteger a la familia, algunas quieren suplir un hueco que falta en casa, muchas otras personas deciden que sea un regalo para sus hijos en navidad o por su cumpleaños; de esas personas unas le tratarán como un juguete, otras como una educación sobre la responsabilidad y otras devolverán o abandonarán ese “regalo” por no tener manual de instrucciones. Muchas son las diferentes formas de ver al perro, más diferente aún es la calidad de vida que le vamos a ofrecer.
Si lo que buscamos únicamente es disfrutar de su compañía, acariciar su pelo cuando estamos tristes o mientras vemos la tele, presumir de nuestro perro por lo “guapo” que es sin presumir de lo que realmente es, que entretenga a los hijos o que me entretenga a mí... mucho es lo que nos vamos a perder de lo que realmente puede ofrecernos.
El enfoque lo es todo. No es moda, no es humano. Es un perro y eso significa mucho. Nosotros los humanos somos los inteligentes y racionales. No es inteligente ni racional pensar que a un perro, animal depredador social cooperativo, le pueden gustar los bienes y comodidades que disfrutamos los humanos. Es más básico, y cosas más básicas hemos de ofrecerles. Paseos, aventuras, juegos cooperativos, normas sociales, la comodidad de comprender su entorno... No necesitan realmente las burbujas de un SPA o los perfumes con olor a frutos del bosque. Lo más que se acerca eso a lo que quiere realmente es la palabra “Bosque” que hay en la etiqueta del perfume o que el SPA con burbujas se lo den puesto que ha estado revolviéndose en el barro después de un baño en el lago y está hecho unos zorros.
Mi trabajo muchas veces se centra en ser el intermediario entre las necesidades humanas y las caninas. Intento hacer que cuadren las unas con las otras. Para ello centro mi esfuerzo en la parte humana para hacerle comprender lo que el perro le está diciendo. Creo en la idea de que todos los que acuden a mi AMAN a sus perros con locura. Por ello es fácil que cambien su enfoque para el bien de sus mascotas y, de rebote, el nuestro. Ya comenté anteriormente en otro artículo que muchos de los problemas de conducta como agresiones, destrozos, micciones en el hogar, etc. son únicamente su forma de expresar el malestar ante una vida que no terminan de comprender. Con el enfoque adecuado no habría expresión de malestar.
Un ejemplo de ésto sería:
Tengo un perro que no para de ladrar a todas horas:
-Opción 1: No hacer nada
-Opción 2: Solucionar el síntoma de ladrar
-Opción 3: Centrar mi esfuerzo en averiguar el porqué de sus ladridos ¿Qué le sucede tan grave que tiene que ladrar constantemente?
Evidentemente la opción 1 queda completamente descartada puesto que terminará por minar nuestra paciencia o la de los vecinos. La opción 2 ya es algo, pero no se soluciona ningún problema centrándose únicamente en los síntomas. Es como un fumador que no para de tomar caramelos de menta por el mal aliento. Tendría mejor aliento si dejase de fumar puesto que ése es el verdadero problema de su mal aliento, siendo el aliento tan sólo un síntoma.
Los problemas que los perros manifiestan son únicamente síntomas de, posiblemente, nuestra incorrecta forma de ver su mundo.
Les pediría a todas aquellas personas que tienen la paciencia de leerme que hagan una reflexión, que miren a sus perros y vean qué es lo que realmente buscan de ellos. Si es amistad ha de ser recíproca, debemos de darle si pretendemos recibir. Animo a que reflexionen y animo aún más a que cambien esa forma de verle si lo consideran necesario. Saber reconocer que lo que hacemos por ellos puede que no sea lo que realmente quieren y actuar en consecuencia es una de las grandes virtudes que puede tomar como opción el ser humano.
Personalmente cuando llegó mi primera perra a mi vida yo buscaba compañía y amistad. La compañía la obtuve gratuitamente, la amistad no tanto. Al tener al perro en casa con la puerta cerrada, en la calle con la correa, en el parque con un vallado... se obtiene de forma forzada dicha compañía, es gratis y no requiere esfuerzo. Para la amistad es otro tema. Mi forma de entender la amistad requiere empatía, comprensión, involucración, paciencia en las adversidades, sonrisas en los momentos buenos y otra mucho más grande en los malos. La amistad requiere de constancia para mantenerla, no puedo pretender mantener una amistad por lo que fue sin prestar atención a lo que es. Todo esto bien llevado forjará grandes vínculos que nos harán compartir increíbles experiencias juntos.
Empatía
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Paciencia
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Sonrisas
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El problema al que me enfrenté es que no soy un perro, soy un hombre. No podía tener empatía si no comprendía su lenguaje corporal, no podía comprender lo que me transmitía puesto que no dominaba el cómo hacerlo. Para poder comprender me involucré en su mundo e intenté aprender de lo que le veía hacer con otros perros en el parque, de los libros de comportamiento canino y de las experiencias de gente más veterana en el mundo canino.
Todo esto requirió de una paciencia ilimitada por mi parte ya que no se aprende en un día, ni en dos, ni en un año, ni en diez. Los perros son extremadamente simples a la vez de tremendamente complejos. No se puede generalizar conductas a la ligera ni tomar como milagrosos los métodos que a otros les han funcionado. Muchas veces erraremos.
Por ganarme la amistad de mi perra me esforcé en ser constante en el trabajo de mi paciencia, empatía, comprensión, involucración en su mundo...
Al fin sucedió. Puedo decir orgulloso que entiendo a mi amiga. Ya no está en mi casa porque la puerta está cerrada, ya no se va de mi lado por no tener correa, ya no hacen falta las vallas de los parques. Disfruto de largos paseos por el campo sabiendo que siempre está cerca porque es lo que quiere. Confiamos el uno en el otro puesto que nos lo hemos ganado. Juntos hemos vivido cientos de aventuras que son de su mundo y no del mío, yo simplemente soy un espectador alucinado y sonriente. Las experiencias que hemos vivido juntos nos han unido de forma que comprendemos las señales que nos transmitimos y nuestros estados anímicos. Sonará pretencioso, pero con ella siento una simbiosis especial y única, la cual me hace odiar el hecho de saber que va a vivir menos que yo. Llegado el momento le prometo poner en práctica su más preciada enseñanza, vive el momento, el aquí y el ahora. Disfruta de todo lo que te hace ser feliz saboreando hasta el último bocado.
Aunque no sepas leer... gracias por tu amistad.
Como leer es cosa de humanos te lo diré como tú entiendes durante todos los días de tú vida.
Si valoras su amistad mírale intentando sentir lo que siente, ten empatía. Comprende su mundo, deja que te lo enseñe. Involúcrate en su vida, ellos ya se involucran demasiado en las nuestras. Ten paciencia, has de saber que para llegar a comprender correctamente a tu amigo van a haber muchísimos malos entendidos. Ten constancia una vez alcanzada la meta, no te relajes o perderás su confianza. Sonríe compartiendo cientos de experiencias juntos y sonríe más aún cuando te venza la paciencia. Forja un vínculo de AMISTAD indestructible. Vive el momento y siente.
Dedicado a Pedro por su primer cumpleaños a mi lado. Sí, Pedro es un perro :)
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